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Die Speccy' 97
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Text File
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1995-08-15
|
5KB
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110 lines
Awopbopaloobopalobamboom!
WindowError:001 Windows loaded. System in danger.
WindowError:002 No error...Yet.
WindowError:003 Dynamic linking error.\n Your mistake is now in every file.
WindowError:004 Erroneous error. Nothing wrong.
WindowError:005 Multitasking attempted. System confused.
WindowError:006 Malicous error. Desqview found on drive.
WindowError:007 System price error. Inadequate money spent.
WindowError:008 Broken window. Watch for glass fragments.
WindowError:009 Horrible bug encounterd. God knows what happend.
WindowError:00A Promotional literature overflow. Mailbox full.
WindowError:00B Inadequate disk space. Need 50 Mb minimum.
WindowError:00C Memory hog error. More RAM needed! More! More!
WindowError:00D Window closed. Don't look out.
WindowError:00E Window open. Don't look in.
WindowError:00F Unexplained error. Please tell us how it happend.
WindowError:010 Reserved for future mistakes.
WindowError:014 Nonexistent error. This cannot really be happening!
WindowError:015 Unable to exit Windows. Try the Door.
WindowError:016 Door locked. Try control-alt-delete.
WindowError:017 Keyboard locked. Try anything you can think of!
WindowError:018 Unrecovable error. System destroyed.
WindowError:019 User error. It's not our fault. Is not! Is not!
WindowError:01A Operating system overwritten. Terribly sorry.
WindowError:01B Illegal error. Do NOT get this error.
WindowError:01C Uncertainty error. Uncertainty may be inadequate.
WindowError:01D Unabel to figure out our own code. System crashed.
WindowError:01E Timig error. Please wait. ..And wait ...And wait
WindowError:01F Reserved for future mistakes.
WindowError:020 Error recording error codes.\n Remaining errors lost.
A bird in hand is safer than one overhead.
A clean desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
A lie in time saves nine.
All's well that ends.
Almost everything in life is easier to get into than out of.
Always store beer in a dark place.
A man will believe anything that does not cost him anything.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.
A Smith & Wesson always beats four aces.
Automatic simply means that you cannot repair it yourself.
By the time most of us have money to burn, our fire's gone out.
Creditors have much better memories than debtors.
Crime is merely politics without the excuses.
Dawn: The time when men of reason go to bed.
Did you know that no-one ever reads these things?
Don't be so humble...you aren't that great.
Don't feed the bats tonight.
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.
Favorite animal: steak
Friends may come and friends may go, but enemies accumulate.
Frustration is not having anyone else to blame but one's self.
Get too many irons in your fire and you'll put it out.
Golf is a good walk spoiled. -- Mark Twain
He who dies with the most toys, wins!
He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
How you look depends on where you go.
If all else fails, read the destructions.
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
I don't eat snails. I prefer fast food.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
If the shoe fits, you're not allowing for growth.
If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.
If you live among the wolves, learn to howl like them.
If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
I'm a self-made man. Who else would help?
In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
Inflation: A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
In the long run, we are all dead.
It's clever, but is it art?
Justice: A decision in your favor.
Know what to kiss -- and when.
Leftover nuts never match leftover bolts.
Life is a temporary assignment.
Locks and keys are for honest people.
Marriage is like burning the house down to toast the bread.
Measure twice 'cause you can only cut once.
Money is the root of all evil, and man needs roots.
Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.
Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
Never eat more than you can lift
Never mistake good manners for good will.
Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.
New systems generate new problems.
People are always available for work in the past tense.
Please take note:
Rabbits dance at the funeral of the lion.
Remember, even if you win the rat race -- you're still a rat.
Revenge is a dish best served cold.
Strong words connote weak arguments.
Succeeding is more satisfying than success.
Surprise your boss. Get to work on time.
Swap read error. You lose your mind.
Tatoos are the common man's way of investing in art.
The best way to save face is to keep the lower half closed.
The bigger they are, the harder they punch.
Them that has, gets.
The rat race is over. The rats won.
There is no remedy for sex but more sex.
There's always one more bug.
This file will self-destruct in five minutes.
Those who do not learn from history often end up making it.
Western Civilization: It would be a good idea.
Xerox never comes up with anything original.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Awopbopaloobopalobamboom!